Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - Quotes

Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - Quotes

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

 - One Liners

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All Fortunes (1186)

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Quotes (50)

One Liners (594)

Colemanballs (247)

Proverbs (78)

Thoughts (179)

10 Random Quotes - [10 More]

0005

My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty, and that's the law.
Jerry Seinfeld

0007

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
Robin Williams

0024

Why can we remember the tiniest detail that has happened to us, and not remember how many times we have told it to the same person.
Francoiss de La Rochefouauld

1185

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now hes gone.
Steven Wright

1186

I have a microwave fireplace. I can lay in front of the fire for the evening in 8 minutes.
Steven Wright

0005

My parents didn't want to move to Florida, but they turned sixty, and that's the law.
Jerry Seinfeld

1187

I have a telescope on the peephole of my door so I can see whos at the door for 200 miles.
Steven Wright

0963

"Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?"
Spike Milligan

0008

I believe that sex is a beautiful thing between two people. Between five it's fantastic.
Woody Allen

1208

I have a large sea shell collection which I keep scattered on the beaches all over the world.
Steven Wright

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