Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - Quotes

Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - Quotes

We have enough youth, how about a fountain of Smart

 - One Liners

[Articles][Pictures][Fortunes][Links]

View the Article Index or See a random Article.
Picture Index or See a random Picture.

Fortunes

Add a fortune that changes each time (like the one in the title bar) to your own web page by adding this HTML to a page:

Select a fortune category:

All Fortunes (1186)

->

Quotes (50)

One Liners (594)

Colemanballs (247)

Proverbs (78)

Thoughts (179)

10 Random Quotes - [10 More]

0022

A philosopher is a person who doesn't care which side his bread is buttered on; he knows he eats both sides anyway.
Joyce Brothers

0029

Not all chemicals are bad. Without chemicals such as hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer.
Dave Barry

0036

"This book is dedicated to my brilliant and beautiful wife without whom I would be nothing. She always comforts and consoles, never complains or interferes, asks nothing, and endures all. She also writes my dedications."
Albert Malvino

0026

When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?""
Sydney J. Harris

1186

I have a microwave fireplace. I can lay in front of the fire for the evening in 8 minutes.
Steven Wright

0006

If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead.
Johnny Carson

0963

"Are you going to come quietly, or do I have to use earplugs?"
Spike Milligan

0964

"Said Hamlet to Ophelia, 'I'll draw a sketch of thee; What kind of pencil shall I use? To be or not be?'"
Spike Milligan

0968

"I'd like to go there. But if Jeffrey Archer is there I want to go to Lewisham" - Milligan on whether he believed he would go to heaven.
Spike Milligan

1200

I like to leave messages before the beep.
Steven Wright

Back to Fishtank Humour