Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - Quotes

Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - Quotes

If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn?

 - One Liners

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All Fortunes (1186)

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Quotes (50)

One Liners (594)

Colemanballs (247)

Proverbs (78)

Thoughts (179)

10 Random Quotes - [10 More]

1198

Im writing a book. I have all the page numbers down, now I just have to fill in the rest.
Steven Wright

0960

"Money couldn't buy you friends, but you get a better class of enemy."
Spike Milligan

1191

I bought some powdered water, but I dont know what to add.
Steven Wright

0010

If it wasn't for pick-pockets and frisking at airports I'd have no sex life at all.
Rodney Dangerfield

0011

The early worm, on the other hand... gets eaten.
Anonymous

0012

Reality continues to ruin my life.
Calvin and Hobbes

0012

Reality continues to ruin my life.
Calvin and Hobbes

0013

If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime.
Anonymous

0970

"I don't mind dying. I just don't want to be there when it happens."
Spike Milligan

0027

Philosophers often fail to recognize that their remarks about the universe apply also to themselves and their remarks. If the universe is meaningless, so is the statement that it is so.
Alan Watts, The Wisdom of Insecurity

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