Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - One Liners

Fishtank Humour - Fortunes Tank - One Liners

No one is listening until you make a mistake.

 - One Liners


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10 Random One Liners - [10 More]


Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse??


A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"


One youngster was explaining to another what "mixed emotions" meant. "It's like watching the school burn down when your new catcher's mitt is in your desk," he said.


I used to be lost in the shuffle. Now I just shuffle along with the lost.


I wrote a song, but I can't read music. Every time I hear a new song on the radio, I think "Hey, maybe I wrote that."


Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?


Sometimes the best helping hand you can give is a good, firm push.


Why are they called buildings, when they're already finished? Shouldn't they be called builts?


Last night as I lay in bed looking at the stars I thought 'Where the hell is the ceiling?'


It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial charges and blamed it on the cost of living.

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