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Have Fun In The Workplace
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  • At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).

  • Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barrelled fingers .

  • Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask "Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it"

  • Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

  • Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after you boss does. This is especially effective if

    your boss is of a different gender than you.

  • Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Cha-cha.

  • Send e-mail to the rest of the company telling them exactly what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

  • Hi-Lite your shoes. Tell people you haven't lost them as much since

    you did this.

  • While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in Palmolive liquid. Call everyone Madge.

  • Hang mosquito netting around your cubicle. When you emerge to get coffee or a printout or whatever, slap yourself randomly the whole way.

  • Put a chair facing a printer. Sit there all day and tell people you're waiting for your document.

  • Every time someone asks you to do something, anything, ask them if they want fries with that.

  • Send e-mail back and forth to yourself engaging yourself in an intellectual debate. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

  • Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair-dancing.

  • Put your trash can on your desk. Label it "IN".

  • Feign an unnatural and hysterical fear of staplers.

  • Send e-mail messages saying there's free pizza or donuts or cake in the lunchroom. When people drift back to work complaining that they

    found none, lean back, pat your stomach and say, "oh you've got to be faster than that.

  • Put decaf in the coffeemaker for three weeks. Once everyone has withdrawn from caffeine addiction, switch to espresso.

  • Whenever answering the phone, and its for your boss, say "He's under his desk screwing his secretary.  Can I take a message?"

  • Strip off all your clothes.  Complain about how hot it is in the office, regardless of the temperature.

  • When your boss is on the phone scream "Dammit!  I'm expecting a call!  Stay off the phone!"

  • If your boss bumps into you, start screaming sexual harassment.  Talk in great lengths about the state laws on harassment.  Get the authorities involved.  Threaten to sue.

  • Sleep with your boss's daughter.  Videotape it.  Pass out copies around the office.  Brag about how easy she was.

  • Steal various office equipment (pencils, staplers, desks).  Frame your boss for it.

  • When asked to do something start laughing hysterically.  Continue this for five minutes.  Calm down and say, "Oh, you were being serious?"

  • Loosen the bolts on the boss's chair.  laugh loudly when he/she falls down.  Play innocent.

  • Whenever the boss starts to tell you a story, interrupt him/her with a story of your own.  Make sure the story is boring and h as no point what so ever.

  • Send a dozen roses to your boss's house when their spouse is home.  Sign an ex-flames name on the card.  Next day, ask him/her how their evening was.  Be obvious.

  • In a colleagues diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".

  • Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local resturant. Let him go.

  • Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now"

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