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Bizzare Uses Of English 2
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Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered in England!


Sign in a laundromat:
Automatic washing machines: Please remove all your clothes when the light goes out

In an office:
Would the person who took the step ladder yesterday please bring it back or further steps will be taken

In an office:
After tea break staff should empty the teapot and stand upside down on the draining board

Outside a secondhand shop:
We exchange anything - bicycles, washing machines etc. why not bring your wife along and get a wonderful bargain?

Sign outside a new town hall which was to be opened by the prince of wales:
The town hall is closed until opening. it will remain closed after being opened. Open tomorrow.

Outside a photographer's studio:
Out to lunch: if not back by five, out for dinner also

Outside a disco:
Smarts is the most exclusive disco in town. everyone

Sign warning of quicksand:
Quicksand. Any person passing this point will be drowned. by order of the district council.

Notice sent to residents of a whiltshire parish:
Due to increasing problems with letter louts and vandals we must ask anyone with relatives buried in the graveyard to do their best to keep them in order

Notice in a dry cleaner's window:
Anyone leaving their garments here for more than 30 days will be disposed of.

Notice in health food shop window:
Closed due to illness

Spotted in a safari park:
Elephants please stay in your car

Seen during a conference:
For anyone who has children and doesn't know it, there is a day care on the first floor

Notice in a field:
The farmer allows walkers to cross the field for free, but the bull charges

Message on a leaflet:
If you cannot read, this leaflet will tell you how to get lessons

Sign on a repair shop door:
We can repair anything. (Please knock hard on the door - the bell doesn't work)

Spotted in a toilet in a london office block:
toilet out of order. Please use floor below

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